"Transformers: Dark of the Moon 3D" Review

Introduction: Transformers: Dark of the Moon 3D is based off of the Hasbro toy line and the TV series of the same name. Directed again by Michael Bay, the film follow Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) and his new girlfriend Carly (Rosie Huntington-Whiteley) as they help the Autobots, lead by Optimus Prime (Peter Cullen) stop Megatron (Hugo Weaving) from capturing the new magical thingamagig called the "Space Bridge" which...does...stuff? Look it's a Transformers movie. Does anyone really care about the plot? The film also stars Leonard Nimoy as New Transformer #5, Josh Duhamel as Army-Tough Guy #3 and Patrick Dempsey as a Jockass #8.

The Review: Let me start out by saying what I thought of the last Transformers movies. Transformers I liked. I thought the action was great, the effects were good, the acting was good and it was pretty funny. The story was... well the action was REALLY good. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen wasn't nearly as good as the first. I mean, I don't hate it as much as it seems everyone else does, but I didn't really like it either. The twins where annoying as hell. Megan Fox REALLY couldn't act. And the story... well the action was pretty good. As for Transformers: Dark of the Moon 3D, well, the action was good.
    Here's the problem. Michael Bay, it seems, so badly has a hard-on for the US Mititary and a need to put as many 'spolsions in his movies that he just made the same movie three time to accomplish getting his weird "Soldiers-Running-From-Fireballs" fetish. It worked the first time because, it was the first time we saw it. It was really cool. The second time it was, passable. The third time it's just boring. The plot's the same as the first two. The action is exactly the same. I mean, people are complaining the Bay reused footage from, his last non-Transformers movie, The Island, when I'm almost positive that he just copy-and-pasted the entire ending of the first Transformers on tohere. It's a giant final battle in a major US city. Sound familiar?
    The weird irony is that those people, like me, who defended Revenge of the Fallen as just a fun movie but didn't like this film, are being told by the people who hated Fallen that Moon is just a fun movie. And, to be honest, yes,Dark of the Moon, on a pure film-making standpoint, is better than Revenge of the Fallen. It's just that I kinda liked Fallen so, not only is Moon a dissapointment, but, because I liked Fallen, I don't feel the relief that most critics got becuse they thought Moon was better. At least the 3D was good enough.

The Verdict: Overall, if you hated Revenge of the Fallen you may like this one. If you've never seen a Transformers movie before, you'll love this. Or, like Michael Bay, if you think thatsplosions are just the bees-knees and think that Call of Duty: Black Ops and Gears of War are the greatest games ever, then you'll LOVE this. But, if you've liked the last two Transformers movie, then Transformers: Dark of the Moon 3D will most likely end up a big, shiny, boring dissapointment. Still, if you get a group of your friends and make fun of this movie, you may have a good time, which is why Transformers: Dark of the Moon 3D gets a rating of: 1.5 out of 6.