The Top Ten Worst Films of 2013

Yep, it's the fun list.

Review 231: "Grudge Match"

A battle of the ages.

The Undefined Gamer: "The Time of the Doctor" Review

Cinema Won no edit because spoilers.

A Very Disney Christmas: "The Muppet Christmas Carol"

"Leave comedy to the bears, Ebenezer."

A Very Disney Christmas: "The Search for Santa Paws"

"Useless pandering song!"

The Undefined Gamer: Hyrule Warriors

For the record, Cinema Won has
no real opinion on this.

A Very Disney Christmas: "The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause"

"I'll get a mop!"

The Undefined Gamer: "The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug" Review

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey was too long. Is the same true for
Desolation of Smaug?

A Very Disney Christmas: "The Santa Clause 2"

"It's the Mrs. Clause."

The Undefined Gamer: Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Oh My!

Three's a crowd.

A Very Disney Christmas: "I'll Be Home for Christmas"

"Hey jingle balls! Move your candy canes!"

A Very Disney Christmas: "Santa Buddies"

"I believe Budderball's tummy always leads

to naughtiness."

A Very Disney Christmas: "The Santa Clause"

"It could be rude, sarcastic. 

Whatever it takes!"

The Undefined Gamer: DC and Movies Don't Mix

Batman, Superman AND Wonder Woman!

That sounds needlessly complicated!

A Very Disney Christmas: "One Magic Christmas"

Because nothing gets people in the Christmas spirit

like horrible suffering and torment!

Review 222: "Disney's Frozen"

"Oh, hey look at that. 

I've been impaled."

Christmas 2013 is Coming... Also Winter

      I know there hasn't been a ton on Cinema Won this past month, but hopefully I can fix it starting now. School's getting busy with college and the whatnot and the holidays are upon us. So this month, I should hopefully have a good amount of Christmas themed stuff going on. Here on Cinema Won, we'll be celebrating A Very Disney Christmas! Starting this Tuesday the 6th and continuing every three days after that, I'll take a look at ten Disney christmas films for your pleasure and my probable pain. That means all the Santa Clauses, all the Santa Buddies, and a few other special ones here and there. Plus, tomorrow will hopefully have a review of the latest Disney film Frozen (Spoiler alert: It's really, really good) as well as some other theatrical reviews. I think I'll be able to see Blue is the Warmest Color, Saving Mr. Banks, Anchorman 2, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, The Wolf of Wall Street and maybe even a few others. So, this week Cinema Won should officially be in Christmas mode. And I've got a weird one to kick things off!

An Undefined Gamer Lost Review: "Bionicle: Battle for Power #1"

Note from The Undefined Gamer: This review was supposed to be for my 2nd anniversary. I planned on reviewing a whole week of Bionicle comics. However, for some reason, after writing the first review, the rest of the comics where deleted from my mind. Meanwhile, this review was forgotten and left to rot in my "Draft" section of my e-mail. Well, better late than never. Here's Bionicle: Battle For Power Number One.

Designated Learning Time: "Blackfish"

SeaWorld is bad? Shocker!

Review 221: "The Hunger Games: Catching Fire"

Peeta should have bread superpowers.

The Undefined Gamer: "The Day of the Doctor" Review

Cinema Won here. I love Doctor Who, but

I'm only on Season Four. Editing this spoiler-free

was the worst thing ever.

Spoiler Warning

The Undefined Gamer: "Speaker for the Dead" Review

Just in time for Ender's Game!

Review 220: "The Purge"

"We are having dinner! No penises!"

The Undefined Gamer: "The Night of the Doctor"

Mitch predicted the future.

I'll now call him Mr. Predictipants.

If D.C. and Warner Bros. Made Marvel Movies

      With the recent release of the still very comic-booky feeling Marvel Studios film Thor: The Dark World and the new for Warner Bros. Batman/Superman still sounding not very promising, I was wonder what would happen if Warner Bros. was in charge of making the Marvel movies and series we know and love today. Most likely, it's dark, gritty and completely missing the point of the character.

Review 219: "Thor: The Dark World"

"Myul Nyua!"

Review 218: "The Heat"

"What part of that wasn't rude?"

Review 217: "After Earth"

"My suit's turned black. I like it, but I think it's something bad!"

The Undefined Gamer: "Van Helsing" Review

Just in time for Halloween!

Halloween 2013: Review 216: "The Blob (1958)"

"That sounds like a dug"

Halloween 2013: Horror in Time: "Alien"

"Come on, cat."

Halloween 2013: The Undefined Gamer: "Dark Shadows (2012)"

Let do Halloween right.

Halloween Week begins!

The Future of Cinema Won

      I just wanted to write something quick in order to say a few things that I think I need to be said. I alway had a tendency to start a NEW SERIES and then several weeks later, end it unceremoniously and never mention it again. And here's why. I don't want Cinema Won to be a job. I may not get paid, have the bigger fanbase or anything like that. But I think I do well and maybe this will grow into something big. Well, bigger. But, I will only do this if I am enjoying it. And series force me into deadline and making watching the film I review an assignment. I do it for work and not for enjoyment, which I think sways the review and takes the fun out of it. So, from now on, I will not be starting any new series. Maybe when I can get videos done, I'll bring back a few, alongside my plans for Awfully Direct. But for now, no more series. I may however start doing more of these monthly themes. If I can plan ahead some and get a manageable number of film to be reviewed, then this could be a fun addition to Cinema Won. And, as always, I will gladly take suggestions and work with others if they are willing to. After all, who knows where this is going to go?

Halloween 2013: Horror in Time: "Night of the Living Dead (1968)"

"They're coming to get you, Barbra."

Review 213: "Epic"

"You just can't stop the rot."

The Undefined Gamer: "Lies" Review

More reading material!

Halloween 2013: Horror in Time: "House on Haunted Hill (1959)"

"And they'll come for you too."

Review 211: "Oblivion"

"Please, don't take any chances..."

The Undefined Gamer Meets The Eighth Doctor

It's a Doctor love-fest!

That didn't come out right...

Halloween 2013: Horror in Time: "The Return of the Vampire"

"Blimey 'e's 'opped! Lord Love-a-Duck!"

Review 209: "Gravity"

"Woof woof."

The Undefined Gamer: "Hunger" Book Review

The sequel to that thing!

Halloween 2013: Horror in Time: "Bride of Frankenstein"

Yes, it is once again time for Halloween on Cinema Won. And this time, we're aren't just looking at one series. We are looking at all of horror! Okay, not all of horror. But, like, ten films! So that's cool. Every week for the next five weeks of October, we will look at a classic horror film from every decade starting in the 1930s and making our way up to the 2010s, with a bonus thrown in. And now, let's kick things off with a sequel! See, they did these even in the 1930s!

Review 207: "The Bling Ring"

"I think this situation is a huge learning lesson

for me."

The Undefined Gamer: "Star Wars: Dark Force Rising" Review

The books strike back!

Thoughts on 'Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D."

Because we knew this was coming.

Review 206: "Gallowwalkers"

"I blew you a kiss.

And you blew me away."

Review 205: "Scary MoVie"

"Look, they still throw their shit."

The Undefined Gamer Talks Nintendo 2DS

Nintendo seems to have a trend of alienating its audiences. Like
the Wii, 3DS, and Wii U before it, it seems that Nintendo once again
seems to have to explain themselves for their new console: the 2DS.

Review 204: "The Family"

"It's a little rough around the edges."

The Undefined Gamer: Rematerialization of the Mini-Reviews

I've been a very naughty boy. So many movies have I watched, but
not reviewed. In penance, here is another helping of mini-reviews.

The Undefined Gamer: "Aura Aura Climber" Review

Well, it's back to video games.

Yeah...

Box Office Purgatory: Episode 2: "Flushed Away"

"Makes me laugh every time that one."

Review 202: "The World's End"

"We're going to see this through to the bitter end.

Or lager end."

BEN AFFLECK IS BATSHIT!!!!!!!!

WORST. BATMAN. EVER.

Look at him. He's not Christian Bale!